Tuesday, April 01, 2008


Linda S. was the first bad girl I ever met. We were in grade school together, age eleven, and got breasts and periods before most of the other girls. It was our physical maturity that drew us to each other.

What fascinated me about Linda was that she knew exactly what to do about her maturity, while I was a clueless geek. She shaved her legs, used tampons, had boyfriends and smoked Marlboros. And she had style, wearing tight t-shirts, low-slung jeans and wide belts. She had beautiful long blond hair, a broad Slavic face and a big confident laugh. I could't understand why she wanted to be my friend.

Her Italian mother was divorced from her Polish father--the only "broken home" on our street at the time. The rest of the divorces didn't come until at least five years later in our Chicago suburb, including my parents'. Linda's mom, Carmella, always seemed to be cooking big pots of tomato sauce, and she scared me. Carmella was the only person who could wipe the smile off Linda's face, and she did it with shouts and hitting. Thank god I didn't see Carmella often; she had a 9-to-5 office job, so Linda and I could run around the house freely.

When I was in fifth grade, I was in a brief love triangle with Linda and my kindergarten best friend Wendy, but I eventually dropped Wendy for Linda. She was the only friend I wanted to be with. We liked to dance in the rain together, listen to pop music and put on glamorous shows for each other in the basement. I especially enjoyed lip-synching to one of Carmella's records, "Goodbye Charlie," by some singer like Dory Previn or Patti Page or whoever it was.

Anyway, Linda was seriously involved in all of my first kissing experiences: 1) She pinned her boyfriend Mike in the schoolyard one Saturday afternoon and forced him to make out with her to prove to me how long she could hold a kiss without taking a breath; 2) She instructed me and a neighborhood boy, Greg, to kiss each other on the lips because neither of us had ever done it before and it was time to learn; 3) We were bored one weekend night with no boys around and decided to practice French kissing with each other, which we did on my bed.

I haven't seen Linda in years, but I thought about her the other day after watching Madonna's 1991 documentary, Truth or Dare. While performing in Detroit, she gets a visit from an old schoolfriend, and Madonna describes her as a bad girl from a broken home who was a bad influence--she showed Madonna how to insert a Tampax, ran around with boys, smoked...

Basically, Madonna--one of our era's biggest bad girls of all--had a wild bad-girl friend in childhood just like my very own Linda. It seems like no matter who you are when you're a kid, it helps to have a bad girl around to guide you through tough times.

"Can I just say that I find it really irritating that everyone beats up on Britney Spears?" Madonna told Elle magazine in February 2001. "I want to do nothing but support her and praise her and wish her the best. I mean, she's 18 years old! It's just shocking. I was so gawky and geeky and awkward and unsure of myself."


Anonymous said...

I only had a bad girl in my childhood for about two days. Child of a friend of my father’s. Her family put us up in NYC while we attended my father’s funeral.

That puts my age at about 7. She was only 11. I don’t even remember her name anymore. Last name was McKensey, I think. I don’t even know what their relationship was to my father.

Anyway: she showed me her breasts and we touched tongues and we pricked our fingers and were “blood sisters” and she was really way too interested in me for my tiny comprehension. I was simply overwhelmed. I think I decided, the way I often did, to just stick the whole episode into a box and think a bout it later. But I never did. It never came up for me again.

When I think about it now, I think the girl was a very lonely pre-adolecent and I was an exotic visitor full of promise. She was too excited about the new company to notice that I was practically an infant.

We went to church with napkins pinned to our heads.

I went with her and her sisters to see a movie wayyyy too mature for me: something called “A Swinging Summer” -- I should look it up. I was intrigued for some reason and declared it my favorite movie.

Then we went home and never saw the Makensies again.

www.thatzcool.co.uk said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
www.magazinearena.com said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Blogger said...

I got my first electronic cigarette kit from VaporFi, and I think its the best kit.

Blogger said...

If you would like an alternative to casually flirting with girls and trying to figure out the right thing to do...

If you would prefer to have women pick YOU, instead of spending your nights prowling around in crowded bars and night clubs...

Then I encourage you to view this short video to uncover a weird little secret that has the potential to get you your very own harem of beautiful women:


Blogger said...

If you need your ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend to come crawling back to you on their knees (even if they're dating somebody else now) you need to watch this video
right away...

(VIDEO) Get your ex back with TEXT messages?